A New Look On Life: December 2013

Thursday, December 19, 2013

My Favorite things.

Here is a list of my Favorite things
1 - the color red

2 - Ghost Town (band)
3 - Mastiffs (Dog breed)
4 - O.C.D-ness
5 - Pacific Rim (Movie)
6 - Coffee
7- My Best Friend
8 - Being by my self or with one friend .
9 - Amazing Life ( Song by Britt Nicole)
10 - Red (The movie)
11 - Painting
12 - Drawing
13 - My Grandpa (R.I.P)
14 - My cousin
15 - The Smell of Happy people
16 - Watching people sleep (creepy right?)
17 - Knitting (yeah , I knit ...)
18 - Cuddling with a pillow (TRY IT!!)
19 - Having paint all over my hands from painting (11)
20 - Seeing How Many people are looking at my blog
21 - Giving hugs to people who badly need them .
22 - ATM Dubstep (not sure what it is but it's on my MP3)
23 - playing Nancy Drew with my sister(PC games)
24 - Making People Smile when the are about to cry
25 - Looking at beautiful dresses
26 - Steam Punk Outfits (AWESOMENESS!!!)
27 - Old Stone Houses
28 - Pandas
29 - Snakes
30 - Having Nightmares( i don't know why)

Dang that was hard ....
wow ..... heh ,, heh....i'm messed-up ... but.... " i like it like that" (song quote) if you know the song ... you're awesome !
Love you ,
Bekca <3

The Hardest Thing Is To Believe ...

Mark 11:22, 24-26

New International Version (NIV)

22 “Have faith in God,” Jesus answered. 24 Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. 25 And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.” [26]

....

I have a Very Hard time Believing in God .
I know that He is real , but believing that he is there for me at all times and that He is listening to my prayers when I pray so just so hard for me to believe right now ...

When I was 16 I begged God almost every night to not let my parents get a divorce , but it still happened ... I lost my faith and I've noticed that I've going down hill since then ... I stopped praying , stopped listening to any Pastor , started listening to wrong music , and stopped reading the Bible .

I... ... ... I'm almost at the bottom of the trench , there is a rope next to me so that I can climb back to the top .... but... do i take hold of it ? ..... or do i hit rock bottom and learn from all my mistakes that I have made and that I'm going ...? .... I don't know what to do any more .

Every time I open the BIBLE I read something I was never taught to do. .... I slam the book shut , put it down , ... and the I won't look at it for weeks . For Example - For as long as i can remember I was always taught to never ask anything from god . then about 4 weeks ago i read a verse similar to this ->

Isaiah 7:11 “Ask the Lord your God for a sign , whether in the deepest depths or in the highest heights.” <- after reading that I got so mad at my parents and god .
Anger toward my parents for not telling me or showing me this
Anger towards God for not allowing me to find it in the first place .

Then about 5 months ago , I started talk to a friend , long story short now he's my best friend . He has helped me more then any human has in a long time and I thank so much him for that . I've started to read the Bible more then once a month , i've noticed more of my horrible actions , and i've been praying more (slowly but surely) and more .

As of right now I'm holding no to the rope . Now i just have to decide to climb up . so i guess all i can do is put a verse at the end of this post ...

Love you ,

Bekca
Mark 11:22-25
22 And Jesus answering saith unto them, Have faith in God.
23 For verily I say unto you, That whosoever shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that those things which he saith shall come to pass; he shall have whatsoever he saith.
24 Therefore I say unto you, What things soever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them.
25 And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses

Friday, December 13, 2013

Acquaintances , Friends , or Best friends ... who knows ...?

As most of you know .... I'm Home-schooled , mind you i'm not a homeschooler ... so..... i look like a kid who goes to a public school . But for kids like me It's hard to make friends ..... Because we have to work to do it .... most teens think " Okay we've talked now we're friends" ..... no , for my kind ... it's not like that at all .... If we are going to be friends we need to know things about you .. like ..... you're favorite food , color, and drink and just simply things that you like . so that we know if we could be friends

Definition of Friend- a person whom one knows and with whom one has a bond of mutual affection .

If we have more then 3 things in common than by all means lets be friends . but if we don't ..... well then ... i guess that we are acquaintances . If you want to be best friends .... well then I need to know everything about you , like ....... what color your shirt is right now .... and ...... how often you take a shower .... and ...... what the last show was that you watched . Random weird stuff like that .... and if i know that stuff then i can start guessing what your going to do next . From example , right now it's 10:04 and i know (cause i know him this well) that my best friend is asleep ... most likely on his left-side .... yeah .... Hahah!

That is how well best friends should know each other, no just simply knowing who you are , but what you are . (in a weird voice) .....muahahahahahahhaha!

Love you people!!!

-Bekca <3

PS.If you do end-up as acquaintances then be nice to one another , don't be enemies .

Thursday, December 12, 2013

Christmas ... GO AWAY !!!!!!

Hey guys !!!
So lately Life has been catching up to me . It's getting stressful to go to my dads on week ends , it's hard trying to keep a straight face when all i want to do is cry , Spiders like to crawl on my laptop when i'm on it ...So help me those spiders better be killed with a gun and C4!!! , And everything is changing . I know that it is how life goes ... but i don't like it , it's all happening to fast . one thing at a time .... please? ..... Christmas has been the horrible so far. We got a different christmas tree that doesn't even smell like christmas . And it's taller then 5'3" ... For as long as i can remember it's been a really short and fat tree .... i don't like how fast things are changing . it's just all to much !!!!! I'm just happy that my best friend calms me down when i get to stressed and stuff ... :)

I love you guys so much !!!!
- Bekca <3