Why so selfish ?

Why are people so eager to hurt one another ?

I've been given the "your so selfish" speech three times by three different people , to be honest this is why I just want to kill myself . I see no reason for me to live if I'm that selfish . 

One thing that I have realized is that in order to get what you want you have to be selfish . If you think about it then you know that I'm right . Even doing things for God , you have to be selfish ! 

To Be Honest ...

I've stopped cutting . 

I've put in my two weeks notice at one of my two jobs .

I've been talking ibuprofen  like a mad person just to make my body stop hurting .

Dating a guy for two weeks then breaking up cause a lot happened .... and it was bad

I've tried to make people happy . but it never seems to work anymore .

For some reason people at one of my jobs think I'm lesbian . Not sure why ... but they do

Christmas is three day away and it's stressing me out . 

I like a guy named Kelby . He and I have so much in common that it's crazy.

I haven't gone to counseling in weeks.

All i have eaten for the past couple weeks is chicken and pizza. 

 To Be Honest ....

 I just want to be done . I want to Disappear .

                                 ~ Bekca <3